With You


very now and then you reach a place creatively that you cannot quite explain or express.

Any one medium doesn’t do it justice.

So you struggle with it until it finds its way out of you.

This creative writing piece was such an expression.

I hope you put on some deeply moving music, leave wherever you are right now, and enter into an age old story that only your heart knows. I’d be interested to hear your interpretations.


ou watched me cry along with my mother for the first time in the delivery room. I was so tiny then, so full of potential. You smiled at the hands that would do great things one day, the feet that would take me to you, and the heart that sang in the key of you.

I was immediately tainted. The instant I was born, I started to die. He smiled along with you, for he was hungry. He named me something different than you would have chosen. He began to befriend me.

You and I were always together. I knew no closer friend. I listened to you, and the world melted away at the resulting light. You danced through the halls of my heart and blew into my life as a wind fills a sail. I wasn’t ashamed of you. Together, the adventure was ours. And the first few chapters were beautiful.

We changed lives for the better. We sparked miracles. You taught me to swallow fear and death and Hades and hang on tight through it all.

He told me to pursue you in practical ways. Logical ways. Ways that drove us apart. Ways that made me forget. Ways that encouraged me to replace you with impostors.

Somewhere along the way I lost you. I thought I saw you many times. I fought hard to pursue you but something was wrong. I couldn’t hear anymore. I couldn’t feel anymore. Everything was so — mechanical. The grinding was deafening.

And before I forgot your touch, before the last warm ember of your memory blew out, before I went numb and walked to his drum, I heard a whisper.

It was you. You were singing. It was a familiar song. I had almost forgotten the melody. It was the only way to save me. You were too powerful and I too weak for you to shout. I would never believe the truth if given to me straight anyway. I was too smart to believe anything straight.

I surveyed my life. The impostors looked up, smiled and raised their glasses to toast me. I was in the belly of fear. Death crouched over me, and Hades lied beneath me. What happened?

I struggled to break free. Tables turned. Glasses spilled. Smiles turned to panic. People ran to my aid. “Are you okay? What are you doing?” they exclaimed. Their faces looked like his in my periphery. I tried to scream, but my throat was swollen.

I managed, “Please forgive me.”

The tables started shaking. With rushing wind and light you came to my rescue. Legions of childhood memories flooded my mind. I could hear my heart beat again. I took a deep breath as I brushed my hand through the water. I could smell your sweet fragrance.

He just laughed. He made fun of you. He made me feel embarrassed to call out to you. They shook their heads and lent a hand back to him. With lightning already starting to pulse through my body, I hung in the balance.

You waited patiently for my response. You have always waited patiently for me. Your power comes alive when I pursue you. When I listen to you. When I run with you. Never when I am scared of you. Never when I am listening to his voice.

Floating in the balance, my splitting headache mirroring my splitting allegiance, I reached out to you. He grabbed my hand and pulled me away. I began to cry. Helpless.

I caught a reflection off the water. It was the twinkle in your eye. Within an instant, your pause was no more. In a fury of emotion, you swept me into your story. We were together again. Sailing. Laughing. Singing. Lightning.

I rose well above everything I had ever imagined. I was flying. With you. My head fell back to take it all in. With you. I was now — with you.

Where I belong.

—Jeff Dolan

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1 Comments With You

  1. Maria Brophy

    Wow, this is awesome, deep, amazing writing. I think it’s God that was by your side, you lost for awhile, and found him again. Right? I think many people can relate to this story – particularly where people try to tell you where to find him, but he’s not there for you…

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